This week’s task was to take the first sentence of any Hopkins poem and write my own poem about the arrival of Spring. Many of Hopkin’s poems such as ‘God’s Grandeur’ and ‘The Starlight Night’ are the same length, consisting of only two stanzas, and follow the rhyme pattern A B B A A B B A / C D C D C D. His poems experiment with language, specifically aural imagery and alliteration. These are all things that have influenced my poem.
Nothing is so beautiful as Spring —
Ice melts as cold nights perish and there are no more chills
I look to the sky as the birds dip and dance over daisies and daffodils
Bees buzz by my ears and I’m in love with their sting
Trees swoop and twirl, leaves tangle and swing
I run to the lake, a smile splashes on my face and my joy overfills
For Paradise is upon us and serotonin Spring instils
As I fly through these fields of yellow, my heart will sing
Clouds glide through my hair, weeds tickle my feet
I close my eyes as sparkling rays whisper in my ear
This burn on my skin of gold and richness is so sweet
Not a single drop of rain or grey cloud is near
As I stand here in this immensity of colours I am complete
Because Spring is among us; beauty is here
Literature with Anna 
Hi Anna,
First things first, I really do love the way you have written this. I always have a fear with writing poetry based on someone else that the work can sometimes feel repeated; however, yours is the complete opposite. I feel you have captured the spirit of Hopkin’s poetry in such a vivid way and I have enjoyed that very much. I particularly like the use of alliteration in the 3rd line of the first stanza (birds dip and dance over daisies and daffodils) as it provides such a joyful image. After reading your poem, I closed my eyes and was able to create an image with what you have written.
Very happy to have read your poem, keep up the great work
LikeLiked by 1 person
Pingback: Peer Review on Anna’s arrival of Spring – A world inside literature
Hey Anna,
Wow! You have really captured the true essence of the bliss that nature provides. As well as this I believe you have perfectly stylised the poem to align with Hopkins poetry while also keeping your own flare. I think what really affirms your own flare in this poem is the techniques you use such as alliteration; “beezs buzz” or “trees…twirl”. This makes your poetry sing and draws me into the moment with you as I am able to focus on these finer elements. I also love how you have made a connection between the nature and yourself by mentioning parts of the body and then adding the photo of yourself embracing nature. This to me was a nice touch as it give the poem even more meaning to not only yourself but me as the reader.
I think another great touch was the small explanation you gave at the start stating how your poem is aligned with Hopkins work. I liked this because it allowed me to go into the poem and already know its connection to Hopkins so I could then focus on the poems relation to you.
All in all, I really like this poem and think you have done a great job!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Pingback: Peer Review 2 – The Best of Literature
Hi Anna,
I have really enjoyed reading this piece, seriously, it is beautifully vivid and reads more like a painting than a poem. This speaks as a testament to your ability to create powerful imagery. You capture the sensory imagination of the reader through this scene you paint of beautiful spring. Your sense of form in this sonnet and the style is evidently influenced by the style of Hopkins’s poetry whilst still being unique to you. It does not attempt to emulate Hopkins’s work but rather draws inspiration from his works. Throughout your work your use of alliteration is common yet well placed eg. ‘bees buzz by’ and adds a lot in terms of flavour to the poem. It is, however, important to note Hopkins’s tendency to reference the divine in his works most likely attributed to his life as a religious man and I think perhaps this can be incorporated into your piece in a clearer way to really drive home the style of Hopkins.
All in all, I am very impressed with your work and am looking forward to keeping up with what you post in the future.
Signing off,
Abanoub 🙂
LikeLike
That is fabulous Anna! Well done! I think the fact that you have tried very hard to stick to Hopkins’ form and rhythm has helped you to be precise in your imagery. This is the way many young poets began to learn their task, through a close imitation of someone they admired.
LikeLike